Houston

I went to Houston last weekend to visit my cousins.  They have a little a little girl who is about 16 months old and super adorable.  She pretty much loved me.  I mean, don't all kids love me?  Haha, okay, no.  They don't.  But she did.  And I loved her more.

 

She loooooooves legos.  I built the towers.  And she destroyed them.  We had a mutual understanding.

We also went to the Museum of Natural History and saw the dinosaurs exhibit.  Very cool stuff. 

This is my cousin Patrick in the above pic.  And that is a dino sloth below.  A sloth!  Crazy!

And Yet Another

I thought I had posted this one a while ago.  I realized I hadn't, so here it is.

I might actually love the birds the most.  Haha.

Day 72

Today is day 72 of P90X.  You would think that by now it would be easier, or more fun, or at least more of an auto pilot sort of thing.  But its not really.  Every night it's a struggle to get on my computer and pop in the disk.  Some nights are harder than others depending on what the workout is.  But lucky for me I have a few lovely ladies in my life that keep me going and keep me on track.

Here they are:

That's Hannah at the top with her little girl who was being suuuuuuuuper adorable.  And then at the bottom you have me, Amy, Hannah, and Nicole.

This is how we workout.  And we chat about what's been going on and what struggles we have and you know, just your average girl talk.  It's great because I get to see my girls just about every day of the week.  And who wouldn't love that?

I try to keep myself motivated in other ways too.  For instance, I found this picture the other day that made me laugh and laugh and laugh.

 I mean, how creepy is that day 90 picture??  Soooooo creepy.  I think I would rather be the before picture.  But it still makes me laugh every time I see it.

On a completely separate note, my favorite quote (or "Tony-ism") from P90X is when we are doing triceps extensions (laying down) and he says "Don't smash your face!"  Then I found a picture of this guy (whoever he is) with this shirt.  And I want it soooooo bad.  So if you are feeling generous and want to get me a birthday present (my birthday is a week from today) then feel free to seek out this man and figure out where he got this shirt and get one for me.  K? Okay.  Thanks!

Two and half more weeks and I can officially say that I am a P90X grad.  How cool is that??? Holla!

Recital

Last Saturday Alex had a tap recital that I went to.  She is taking a tap class (she is in college) and at the end of the semester there is a recital for all of the dance classes at the school.  There was also a dance company that preformed and ya-dee ya-dee ya.  It was great.  You get it.

Anyways, my point in writing this post was to tell you about one of the performances.  And no, it is not the one Alex did.  She really did great though, and we all cheered.  But that is not the one i wanted to tell you about.

It was maybe the second or third performance, and out filed about twenty or so people.  Both men and woman.  Their ages ranged from 18 to maybe 40 years old.  I don't really know, it was hard to say.  Some carried hula hoops and some carried long ribbons, and some didn't carry anything.  Right away you could tell this one was going to be different.  Every person on stage was somehow afflicted with a handicap.  A few had Down Syndrome while the rest had other physical and mental handicaps.  My heart was already melting.  I don't care who you are, it takes a lot of courage to get up on stage and perform in front of people.

The music started and there was one person leading the group.  You could tell they were nervous, but they knew their parts and they glanced back to the leader every now and then to make sure they were on point.  I think I cried through the entire thing. Tears streamed down my face from beginning to end.  It was just beautiful what they were doing.  Not because they all did their parts at the exact right moment or because the moves they were doing were so amazing, but because it just...was.  I don't even know how to tell you, but it was just amazing.

I sort of felt like an idiot crying there in the front row.  I mean who just cries like that...in public no less?  But I did.  And I don't care.

And when they were done the audience roared and screamed and praised them for their performance.  They had the loudest and biggest reaction from the audience, by far.  They shuffled off the the stage with their faces lit up like nothing could touch them.

It was wonderful and I'm so glad I got to see it.

Oil

I have been to a couple oil painting classes lately.  They are always three hours long and I walk out with the finished product.

Here are the outcomes of my time there.

 I think it is interesting how dark the sky in the middle looks in the one above, but when you add in darker colors around it, it looks so light!  I didn't change anything in that middle part from the top picture.  Weird, right?

 And that's all!

One Thing at a Time

Are you currently, or have you ever been a New Year's resolution maker?  I used to be huge into it.  I used to love making resolutions for the new year.  I would always get so excited about how I was going to improve my life in the next 12 months and how it would make me soooo awesome!  And then I discovered, as many do, they there is an expiration date on those resolutions and your resolve to accomplish them, and its only about a week or two.

I have come to be smarter about these goals.  I have learned to reduce the number of them, and make them more realistic.  I have also learned that I am not good at working on more than one big goal at a time.  I get too stressed out.  I don't really know if its that I am not good at compartmentalizing my life, or I just stress too much, or what.  But whatever the term for it is, I suck at it.

For instance, a friend the other day asked me why I had not yet completed a certain goal that I have.  It is a goal I have had for a while and when I think about it, it just stresses me out.  I know I need to work on it, but its not one of those 21 day things where I can just make it a habit and all will be well.  It is something that will probably take me about a year or more to accomplish and will include a lot of work and a lot of stress.  And also a lot of disappointment if I don't reach my goal.  I told him I am still thinking about it.  He tells me all the time that I could have accomplished it already if I had just started when I first had wanted to.  I know this.  And I am disappointed I didn't do it then, although looking back, I don't think it was the right time or situation.

But either way I have other big things going on in my life that I am working on and adding anything else to the mix will cause a lot of negative side effects.  Like stress.  Like over eating.  Like getting depressed about things.  Like quitting working out.  Like unnecessary crying.  Like shutting people out.  The list could go on.

But wow, I really sound like a freak! Are we still friends now that you know I do these things???  I know I can be crazy.  Bahhhh. But if it makes you feel better I try to hide the crying and over eating and depression and all that.  Okay, yeah, that doesn't help.  Well, anyways, I am who I am.  It's whatever.

All of this does not mean that I can't multi-task or have more than one thing going on.  I mean, I go to work everyday.  I have friends who I keep up with.  I work out 6 days a week.  I go to painting classes on occasion.  I paint in my spare time.  I work on the books I am writing.  I craft.  I grocery shop and do laundry.  I clean and do dishes.  So I mean, its not like I am totally useless.  I think I am just writing this to make myself feel better about not accomplishing, or working on (for that matter), the goal that my friend asked me about.

The real issue is if i have too many balls in the air, so to speak, at some point I will not only drop one, but I will get tired and drop them all at once.  And then I quit everything in life except for things like showering, sleeping, and dragging myself to work.

So in conclusion, I've decided that it is okay to be a one-goal-at-a-time gal.  I feel like as long as I am working on at least something in my life, then I am moving in the right direction.  Progress is progress, right?

This is what I tell myself anyways.

Journal Entry from 08.28.2012

Me: "I keep failing."
God: "Keep trying."


That was the entire entry.  I read this back today.  I was surprised at the energy with which it hit me so many months later and how much it still applies to my life today even though my struggles are different.







Keep trying.