In the past V-day (as in Valentine's Day) has often felt like D-Day in my life. I was always bitter and angry and hateful to people. Mostly because I was perpetually single on that "special day of love." (I say that last part with the most sarcasm I can muster. lol) But anyways, that is a thing of the past. I have learned to like the day, and it no longer feels like the day that destroys every ounce of self esteem I have.
Maybe it's because I have just grown up a little. Maybe it's that I can finally see the good. Maybe it's that I am simply happy for other people and their love for one another. Or maybe it's because I have seen that love can find you on the most random of days when your hair is messy and you have no makeup on or when you are making a fool of yourself and singing karaoke. Love is a funny thing like that.
Valentine's Day this year was pleasant. I was happy to read people's statuses of surprise flowers and candy and all sorts of happiness being spread around. I have to admit I secretly judged everyone's V-day outcomes to see who's honey did the best. Ya know, of the one's that posted statuses or pictures. Hey, I had to occupy myself somehow. haha
I got a text from Abdoul that day too. I hadn't heard from him in about six weeks and I was hoping he would forget that we met 2 years ago on Valentine's Day. But he didn't forget. And I guess that is nice that he remembered. Except I really wish he would stop texting me. It's not that I hate him or anything like that. I just can't let him in emotionally or otherwise anymore. And a simple text back will make him think we are talking again, which will also make him think he needs to come over, which would then make him think we need to get back together. It's just a bad cycle. So really as much as I would like to be a nice person and let him know that he crossed my mind that day too, I just can't. And maybe that makes me the bad guy. Maybe that makes me a jerk. But really, it's what's best for me. And that is what matters right now.
A million thoughts about this post, but really, I'm going to tell you about my Valentine's Day so you can judge how my mr. did compared to the others. He wrote me a poem and left it for me to find when I woke up. Then I spent all day cleaning diarhhea and trying to please a teething baby. Then Devin came home and we went to Wendy's with the whole gang. Then we tried to get a movie, failed, and stopped at the pharmacy to pick up my medicine on the way home. He had a surprise for me, chocolate dipped strawberries that he had made in his lab at work that day, with another little poem he had written. And then he went to bed, and then I went to bed an hour or two later. We're soooo crazy romantic.
ReplyDeleteYou guys are definitely the champions of romance. Haha. But really, chocolate strawberries and poems are awesome! Nice work.
DeleteAlso, totally right on about Abdoul. Don't do it. Remember a long time ago I told you that dating was one of those times when you have to be a little selfish? You absolutely have to think about what is best for you. Once you have made your choice and get married, then you begin a life of selflessness. So, yeah. I'm with you on this one.
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